To the top we climbed.
A DANCE WITH FEAR: A GUIDE TO UNLEARNING FEAR
By Jessica Clifford
#1. LET YOUR WHY LEAD YOU - We all have reasons WHY we want to do things in life. We also have a lengthy list of excuses for WHY NOT, which often lead us to making decisions. Go deep and connect with yourself. Find a reason that is so massive that you have to say "YES I CAN". Dare yourself to be BIG ! Attach meaning and purpose to whatever it is you are wanting to face. This will be your key to staying focused in the midst of dancing with your fear. Positive affirmations, visualization and more.
#2. ONE STEP FORWARD AND HALF A STEP BACK - It might not seem like you're getting far, but with enough practice you will gain comfort in the things you once dreaded. Keep moving forward with eyes and heart centered on your self-compassion, letting go of any timeline you might be holding on to. There is no rush for anything. We will freeze, shake, whimper, cry, shout, and panic but it's about your momentum. With that being said, practice sitting with your fear, in very small ways at the start. Grow the size of your steps over time.
Take me for example. I'm terrified of heights and truthfully did not anticipate my fear being an issue here on Mount Rinjani. When I think about it logically, a mountain is massive and has a wide, sturdy base; the chances of falling off are slim. I didn't anticipate feeling so frightened at the peak and so now I am more aware that I have my work cut out for me. Starting small, I'll hike up more hills and small mountains. I plan on getting back into bouldering and specifically learning to slow down my breath (from the belly) when I feel the fear consume me. This scary experience just made me more aware of what I can do to prepare myself to cope with this fear in the future, since I refuse let it control the choices I make in life.
#3. BE AFRAID, BE VERY AFRAID - Be as terrified as you want, it won't limit your ability to move through your fears. There are techniques, tools and coping strategies which will allow for you to continue trekking on. From breath-work to visualization, affirmations, carrying stones, crystals, aromatherapy, water bottles, go grab your tiny bottle of Ativan if you have to; whatever you have to carry with you that will sooth your mind in the "worst-case scenario". Cognitive-behavioural Therapy, Exposure Therapy, Reiki Masters, Energy Healing and more, you get to take your pick with which avenue you can take to help ease your worried and stressed mind. Courage is about being terrified and still moving through the fear. I'm not saying OVERCOME your fear. I'm saying just accept it. Be as terrified as you want, but DO something about it
#4 . IN GOOD COMPANY - Your friend or partner or the company your with, make sure they support you and understand what you are facing or working through. It can be extremely damaging to practice facing your fear with negative and selfish people barking at you or making you feel like a baby. You want to look for individuals who have a lot of patience, who can push you but respect your limits and who don't judge you for whatever happens at the end of your experience. It's not about them but it helps to have their support. Our incredible experiences are magnified when we're surrounded with amazing people. Do whatever screening you need in order to find your perfect matches, you might have a different buddy by your side for different activities and that's great.
#5. TAKE THE LEAD - When you're dancing with fear, it's easy to get lost and lose your position as the dominant lead. When fear creeps up in the midst of our activity it can be paralyzing. Take control by setting the pace, take breaks and move to your own beat. Sometimes we feel pressured to go hard and get things over with but that's when a massive storm can hit our bodies in the form of panic - choosing a fight or flight response. Back to square one and build from the bottom up when you're in the dance. Take a step back, reposition, posture, listen to the music anddddd GO!
THE BIG PICTURE: Putting It All Together
Move slowly. Talk it out. Compromise. Remember your Why. Focus on the meaning and purpose behind your current challenge. Keep moving forward no matter how much you slip back, breath from your belly and use affirmations - tell yourself you can do it. Remember YOU invited this experience into your life, visualize yourself completing the challenge and finally, feel the energy of the company you have around you. This is your moment for all the tools, tricks and tips to come together as one. You have so many opportunities to make this happen, so many outlets and so much time. You've got it! One foot in front of the other enjoy your journey to the top.
Her free-spirited and bubbly personality allow her to connect with people from all walks of life. She is a certified Life Coach, a writer, blogger and avid traveller who has difficulty leaving her house without her Nikon. She strives to serve, showing people how to get what they are most wanting in life whether it be physical, emotional, financial or spiritual.
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